Game of the Year, 2008

Gobblin' games

Game the First: "Don't Tip the Waiter"

An exciting game of food balance challenge greets our gang for the Turkey month warm up. A cardboard waiter holds a teetering tray and discs with pics of various delectable treats are placed on the plate. Sounds simple but look out! When the waiter tips and the food hits the floor the last player who placed loses a buck. Final contestant with cash wins. At right we see Dr Kirby balance king non pareil and clear winner of this classic skill test. Ages four and up.

Second up: "Zathura! Adventure Awaits!"

Beauty graphics and interesting game pieces make this a visual treat. The gimmicky "control panel" that pops cards out adds to the thrill-a-second atmosphere. Unfortunately it's all wasted on a game of "communal effort" where everyone wins if no one loses. Hmm ... smacks of pinko-ism to me! Maybe the game should have been called "Communist Conquest of Space". At right we see the sole evil robot who ranked as barely a bother. A few more evil robots would have been nice or even some blaster ray gun action or photon torpedoes. Or even better some hot leggy Space Nymphs, I mean, we are talking about a game of team effort here where everybody wins, right? Well, here at left we see our sole winner, the first to reach the Planet Z. Could he be happier? I think so, with a few of the aforementioned additions to this half a snore bore.

Third and final: "The Mob"

In spite of the late Mr Hoover's insistance of it's non-existence we can clearly see that there is at least a game of "The Mob". It's your basic Monopoly rip off with gangsters subtituted for run of the mill capitalist climbers. Players try to corner "rackets" and are able to "muscle in" on certain territories. Flaw one: The Muscle-able properties change hands repeatedly while others never do. Flaw two is that like it's elder legitimate counterpart, the game tends to drag into infinity as there is no slow or fast way to eliminate opponents. After over an hour of play there where still several properties unpurchased simply because no one ever landed on them. At right we see our capo di tutti capo smugly contemplating his ill gotten gains. Below Dr Kirby tries with all his might to muster up some swag for the finale but ...too little too late. Youse all should try dis game. The gang agreed that the absence of any mention of prostitution and drugs made it suitable for all ages but unrealistic. Flaw three: The game could be improved in a major way if there were some mothod of "whacking" other players. Still a most successful game night. Can't wait until December!

Things that go bump on Bad Movie Night

Stunned. Trying to forget. Bad Movie night before Halloween and still none of the game kings has mentioned or posted on it. Well, I'm ready. First we see the early arrivals taking in the new Bad Movie Night lounge. The Doctor can't believe the complete lack of window treatments.

Patience dear Doctor. Then we see Dennis and the Colonel can't believe the atrocity that is our first movie, "Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity".

Right boys, they don't call it Bad Movie Night for nothing.

This is the villain. You know he's evil because he's got a mystical miniature hula hoop. And he's got the evil greaser vibe. Turns out his hobby is hunting people who keep crashing their spaceships on his planet. His planet, his jollies I guess.

But our animal skin bikini clad slave girls have a surprise for him. Hey, haven't I seen this movie? Then there's this guy:

Your guess is as good as mine. Our next feature wasn't so much a bad movie as a very strange one: 1922 Swedish silent "Haxxan" aka "Witchcraft Through the Ages". You might expect the Spanish Inquisition and you would be correct. Along with nun insanity, crones galore, really cool 20's broomstick flying special fx, kissing of devil ass and much more that one would never expect from the silent era. Good score too.

Septic September?

Game One: Battle Cry!

Hoo-hah! It's the War Betwixt the States, suh! A battle of brains to be certain with Dr Kirby trying his dangdest to vanquish them damn Yankees. Here at left we see the son of the South sotted with grape and agog at the might of the industrial North. Let no one say that he was afeared to strike the first whollop. His troops moved without mercy into the heartland of Lincoln loyalists and kicked keester.

At the right we see General Grant smirking at Bob E. Lee's attempts to stave off the Blue Belly tidal wave. The South soon, facing setback after setback and in spite of a gallant try at historical rewrite, was on the ropes before it knew what had happened.

At left we can see the intensity of the brawl as Lee valiantly wards off the oncoming Yankee doom. Note the blood red dice ominously perched in the back ground. The South fell again but holds dear hopes of rising anon. All in all a great game. Several of the members recalled playing this one as kids. Highly recommended. One of a series of games along with "Skirmish", Hit the Beach", "Broadside" and "Dogfight". Winners all!

Game Two: Chop Suey:

A hidden classic from 1967. Players attempt to grasp chunks of "suey" with plastic chopsticks from a wind up rotating bowl. Irrepressible mirth ensued as well as appetite stimulation. At left Dr Kirby tries to sate his hunger. Hold on Doc! That's the game you're about to digest! Good for a fifteen minute interlude and fine for a once round, this game hardly left any hungry for more. I won! This makes this a Chop Suey memorable... at least for me!

Third Game: Monad!

Well ...words fail. I mean, what can be said about this compact powerhouse from the 3M game mob. The crew decided to let the picture at right tell it's thousand word tale and spare everyone tedious verbiage on the merits of this dynamic knockout! Dr Kirby was declared the absolute winner of Monad! Kudos K!

Game Final and Fourth:Take Twelve.

You take fourteen die and what do you get? Another game over and weeping I'll bet. But seriously ...for a rollin' bones offering this was entertaining. Two die are rolled and number combinations are matched with the other 12 numerically marked dice. When number matches can no longer be made the players turn is over. Numbers shaken and taken are added up. After four rounds a grand total is tallied and winner declared. I kept score and guess who won? Give up? Me! Haw! By 3 points! Double Haw! The lesson for all is make sure you know who's doing the accounting! Thumbs up for this deceptively simple cube-a-thon!

Game Night Is Good for You

Sure, everybody knows that Game Night makes you smarter and better looking. But did you know that that, due to the complex nutritional value of the refreshments consumed during an evening's hard play, it is also good for you? And it keeps you regular. I shit you not. Let's take a moment to review the essentials of the monthly Game Night Diet. First, of course, a balanced supper at the tavern conveniently located right next to our undisclosed location.

Then it's off to the Game Castle where the real feast awaits. All the game night food groups: wasabi, peanut, chocolate, cheez & bourbon. But, wait! Something is missing.


That's right Colonel. We forgot the vino and the Jim Beam. The game kings are actually divided into fiercely rival political camps: the wine party (known for some unknown reason as "The Grumps") and the whiskey party ("The Bumps"). Not to give anything important away but the Bumps will be winning all actual contests this night, fortified as they are by the special treat of smooth, 100 proof, Snob Creek.


We open the nights gaming with "Battle Cry". This war between the states will be fought with a Bump general staff for the North and a Grump one for the South. Oh, oh. Looks bad for the Rebs as the Army of the Potomac marches unopposed into Virginia.


Victory is clenched as the last Confederate resistance is cleaned out of the Chicago brothels. "Gen. Grant" is shown here smoking some sort of cheese cigar. ???



Appropriate, if not politically correct.





The Colonel demonstrates the correct use of chopsticks as he pinches out a narrow win.



Do I get this one? Not in the least. Perhaps the Doctor can explain once he's polished off that bottle.



Last call. Some kind of cheesy dice game. Time for the kings to wrap it up for September and sleep it off knowing full well that their cardio and other vital systems are safe for another month.

August Au Jus

First: "They Live in Fear Among Us!" (ver. "D") Starting off this month as we have before with yet another new and improved version of T.L.I.F.A.U. It must be better 'cause I lost. So vexed with demon drink that I had Dr. Kirby give the thumbs up even though he wasn't the winner. *ahem!* The dark horse took the trophy. A final slight modification and this game will be one for the vault!

Second game:"Dealer's Choice"

No snide comments about what was being dealt please. This was a fine contest of who could be the lowest and sleaziest used car dealer on the block. What would it take for me to get you into this game? What would I have to say to convince you that your life would only improve after taking this model out for a little spin just to get the feel of it? OK. This was a merry romper. I'd play again and next time pay more attention to the rules. Came in dead last. The man in black takes home his second trophy of the evening. I personally recommend this one as the 'play of the night".

Third Strike: "Stay Alive"

And for our final entrant a marble maze game. This one was fun too. Players take turns pulling levers to topple opponents marbles into the 'pit of doom' under the playing board. The game arena was filled with the screams of helpless glass spheres as they fell to their fate. Oh the inhumanity! I lost yet again keeping my perfectly awful run of ill luck intact for the entire evening. At least I wasn't the first one out on this game and the level of concentration required met my dimming supply. Yes, it was a clean sweeper for eve's winner as he took the third game in a row. How can he cheat so deftly? A Dr Kirby supplied game and again, a thumbs up! Just as an aside it was good to have Zeus guarding the door. He kept interlopers away and even gave El Marko the growl when he briefly crashed the festivities. Good work, Zeus! An extra cheezit for you!

Fish are jumping and the cotton is high

Just as we squeezed two months of Game Nighting into half a month's time I'm squeezing two photoplays into one post. Here the Col. tastes victory in his own TLIFAU.
And here he wins the other July game, a priceless piece of comedy called "Redneck Life". Don't you judge me! And speaking of judgement, here we have what I like to call "Evil Enters the Picture". Special guest redneck, Evil Eric.Then the gang settled in to enjoy some recent issues of "Fear Agent", greatest comic book of all time. Ssssh!
On to August

One last time into the extra-terrestial breach. Play moved well and was quickly over. Guess who won down on The Farm?
Then it's wheelin and a dealin with Dealer's Choice. Personally, I'd have liked to deal the wheels from Redneck Life.

Still, you can't beat winning. Couple of real pimpin rides on the lot that night.
Can't stay awake for all of them. I know I had some marbles around here somewhere. But now I seem to have lost my marbles. Ssssh...

(psst, pictures too crappy for poster size reproductions? try the real thing over at the Game Night Flickr site)