carol of the old ones

Frank wishes the Game Night gang Merry Xmas!

Live Long & Prosper

Beetman & Nimoy, a photo by Link.n.Logs on Flickr.

Merry Christmas from Louise

Fubar 2 Fubar

The feature for Bad Xmas Movie Night on 12/12/11 will be Fubar: Balls to the Wall. This is a sequel to the small budget film Fubar (2002). Not that the beauty, eh, of F:BttW cannot be appreciated without knowing its predecessor but here's a little background anyway, from Wikipedia:

FUBAR is a 2002 mockumentary film, directed by Michael Dowse, based on the lives of two lifelong friends and head-bangers living out their lives, constantly drinking beer. FUBAR debuted at the Sundance Film Festival in the 'Park City at Midnight' category, which previously launched such films as The Blair Witch Project. Since its release, it has gained critical acclaim and a cult status in North America, but especially within Western Canada. It was both filmed and set in Alberta, particularly in and around Calgary.

It was filmed entirely with digital cinematography, on a shoestring budget that required many involved with the project to max out their credit cards in order to complete the movie (according to an interview on their official website). Many of the people featured in the movie (including the fist-fighters) were bystanders who thought that the filmmakers were shooting a documentary on the common man.

FUBAR features characters partly based on a comedy routine performed by David Lawrence and Paul Spence that they developed based on the head-banger subculture. David Lawrence, Paul Spence, and S.C. Lim also appear in Michael Dowse's movie, It's All Gone Pete Tong. (Dr. S.C. Lim plays himself in FUBAR as Dean's doctor. Lim actually is Michael Dowse's doctor.) The characters of Terry and Dean were later seen again, featured in the Michael Dowse-directed music video "The Slow Descent Into Alcoholism" by The New Pornographers.

 ...

This is the story of two lifelong friends, Terry (David Lawrence) and Dean (Paul Spence), who have grown up together: Shotgunning their first beers, forming their first garage band, and growing the great Canadian mullet known as "Hockey Hair". The lives of these Alberta everymen are brought to the big screen by documentarian Farrel Mitchner (Gordon Skilling), a young director who decides to take a look at Terry and Dean through a lens, exploring the depths of friendship, the fragility of life, growing up gracefully, and the art and science of drinking beer "like a man".

Their lives are complicated by a snubbing by their "party leader" Troy, better known as Tron (Andrew Sparacino). When Farrel discovers that Dean is hiding a serious case of testicular cancer, the wheels are set in motion for Dean to seek treatmentfrom Dr. S.C. Lim (Dr. S.C. Lim). With Dean's last weekend before surgery approaching, Terry decides to take Dean, Farrel and the film crew camping. Things take an unexpected turn by the third day, and Terry and Dean must cope with further tragedy.

The Invisible Hand Screws Us All

The Game Kings prepare to play the market. Ripped from the headlines. Zeus has his own plans.



The market opens.



This is going to be a headscratcher.

Hopes and fears are on the line.



PROFITS DOWN!



Read it and weep. All of us lost money.



But one of us loss less. Mr. Still Has Some Moneybags.

Million dollars

Million dollars a video by Link.n.Logs on Flickr.

Victory to the Glorious Red Army!

Debacle!
Sure, we were all caught unawares by the swift victory of the Red Army. Nobody expected Capitalist resistence to collapse so quickly but that is the nature of class struggle.
The bourgeoisie lives by the acceleration of production but, at the same time, seeks to slow the pace of struggle.



But, in the end, the contending forces will take their position.



Stay alert, comrades!



The Red Army advances!



And, at last, the ruling class, appalled and disheartened, removes itself from the scene and retreats to the dustbin of history.

Tonight We Ride!!!

Game Night tonight.

Will I feast on the entrails of my opponents, drink the very marrow from their bones and show them a hell unlike any from their worst nightmares...or will I merely gorge myself on Fritos and Schoolboy cookies, and let the dice roll as they may?

Stay tuned, gentle reader, for tonight--WE RIDE!!

Roky Erickson - Night of the Vampire

Kitty in a Casket - Bride of the Monster

It's After the End of the World

Don't you know that yet. The words of the prophet, Sun Ra.  And this old white guy is on the spaceship  too. But let us break it into stages. 


Stage One: Unbridled Speculation


   

The young, the old, the idle rich, the dissolute, the desperate and the rapacious; by this stage all the parasitic elements of society have entered the game.
    
 Speculators surge from auction to auction snapping up classics and forgeries alike blinded by the belief that whatever unbelievable price they may pay today someone else will double tomorrow.
    
 Even untutored musicians gamble and win.


    

Until, that is, the game ends. 

 "As is always the case, prosperity very rapidly encouraged speculation. Speculation regularly occurs in periods when overproduction is already in full swing. It provides overproduction with temporary market outlets, while for this very reason precipitating the outbreak of the crisis and increasing its force. The crisis itself first breaks out in the area of speculation; only later does it hit production. What appears to the superficial observer to be the cause of the crisis is not overproduction but excess speculation, but this is itself only a symptom of overproduction. The subsequent disruption of production does not appear as a consequence of its own previous exuberance but merely as a setback caused by the collapse of speculation."  Karl Marx 

Stage Two: It All Comes Crashing Down


   
 There comes a time in all markets when promises and professions must give way to solid objects. As St. Peter says to Dante "Now the alloy and the weight of this money have been well examined; but tell me if you have it in your purse." Or, as Marx goes on to say, "Under the ideal measure of values there lurks the hard cash."
    
 And so the hapless and the hardy race across the denuded landscape scrambling for guns and groceries before popping into the shelter, if they're lucky. This fellow was, but what a price he paid.
    


 Stage Three: Madness


   

Which brings us around, as so often before, to the inexplicable, tangled world of Lovecraft. I've done that already and we all know where it leads:
   
Look carefully into the Die of Fate.
    
 Take heed in these dangerous times. Board games, are they the answer or can overindulgence lead to this:
   

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October-pests!

Game one:"Masterpiece"
Art snobs sign in please! Round and round we go bidding on art that usually turns out to be worth far less than what we paid for it if it's worth anything at all! Is there some un-subtle message that the center of the playing board is a self portrait of Vincent VanGogh? It took me several years to hunt this baby down at a garage sale and it was worth the wait. Each player was assigned a character from the game box pic. I was ...uh ...Victor? Raul? Bah! That's me with the beard and my hand up on the cover wishing it was a booze filled glass. I made my character a sodden rich drunk and he played exactly as cast! I ended the game with the least money, completely spifflicated and holdiong a fake DeKooning to boot! Hey! I bought it 'cuz I liked it, not for some pedestrian monetary gain! *HIC!*

Here we see our winner the sly "Cinnamon"! A former rock groupie who cast a bewitching mesmer spell over the entire field of play. In the pic above she stares beyond her controlling eminence gris at a stark fave painting of a lonely midnight diner haunted by minimal patrons and help, a sure sign that Halloween is not far off!

Game 2:"Zombiegeddon"

Wait ...we played this one before! Yeah! I should just tell you to look at the other posting and save my aching fingers the torture of typing!
Wait yet again! Is this some kind of "POG" game variant?!? No!
Let's not ask this guy! He obviously isn't sure where he is let alone what he might be doing!

Yep! We played this before but half the crew was gone so we reprised it. And it was great! Again! AND (this is the best part ...) I won! WOO-HOO! Cheers to me! The top back stabbin', shelter hoggin', zombie poppin' king o' the board! POW! Bring on the walkin' dead! I'm armed and ready to go!

Game 3:"Cthulu Dice"
Roll the bone and bet you brains. You get 3. Lose your brains and you're insane but not out! Winner is the last one with a firing neuron. Fast, simple and fun. What more could you want? Inexpensive? Yeah ...it's that too!

Dr. K took the first round and clearly came too close to the edge of madness from the encounter to draw back in time. Easy there doc! Keep telling yourself: "It's just a game,IT'S JUST A GAME!!!!"
This is smilin' me after winnnin' the second go round! Why no mad stare from moi? Far too close to the borders of sanity on a daily basis to let yet another dance on the edge disturb me! See you in November!

September tries

Game one: "Sky Runner"
Neato! Build a 3 story skyscraper and then climb it, all the while trying to keep the competition from getting topside before you.
The climb is controlled by cards. Opponents can be foiled by playing equipment failure cards

It's also possible to hoist yourself up on other players backs. None of these cunning strategies were employed by yours truly who brought home the win. See me grin! Yeah! I just held back and gathered equipment while the others tore at each others lines and when the time was ripe I climbed like a monkey on fire! Just call me "Topper"! (Helps if the game is yours and you can scan the rules in advance.) Fun! Play it again sometime.

Game two:"Zombie Dice"

Roll the dice until you bang out your brains. Last man left with most brains wins.

Above we see the winner and our own version of Al Einstein. Doesn't speak well for the overall I.Q. rating of the game gang but hey ...it's about the fun not the thought!
Game three:"Duel"
Below Dr. Kirby wracks his top knot trying to mesmer a move. Giant dice are lined up and rolled the number of dots showing in a straight line or a one turn line. Tumbling on the adversaries die takes it off the board. Normal gigantic six sided dice are used except the one kingping die which has one dot on all six sides. Capture it and you win.
It's possible to almost smell the light curls of smoke issuing from Dr. Kirby's ears as he struggles with the complexity of the game board in the photo above.
All to no avail. The devious "D" dices the Doc and ends the game with mitts full of square triumph! Odd, as the other pic made it look like Dr. K was the burgundy boy. Hmmm ...have to look into that!
Game four:"Hooked"

A"fish for all" in this Minnesota original. Get the lures and leeches guys! 3 boats venture forth onto the lake trying to land lunkers. It's all in the cards. We played 2 teams versus me! Guess who lost? Yeah ...no problem figuring that out. Spent all my time dockside moanin' about my dry line.
Above are the winners, Ahab and Starbuck gloating over the tuna tin. Nice work Swabs! Don't forget to "mount" the trophy! See you next month!
,

How to Draw a Comic Book

This is what I was up against. In my mind I couldn't help but take a drawing lesson. Using two circles to make a human figure. Two circles. Medicate me.

Fear of heights.



Up we go.



The Colonel takes this.



Hey, I wuz distracted.



Finally, a game that requires BRAINS!



Dr. Kirby explains the concept.



What he didn't explain was how he "doctored" the dice in the first round. The Frog tries his luck.



I emerge from my drawing lesson to master the second round.



Then the Zombie Showdown. Colonel displays the minty freshness.



I take the Duel.



And then my camera ran down. The last game was a fishing competition. Colonel was grumpy because he didn't have no fishin' buddy. Dr. & me trumped with three trophy swimmers. Kind of like this:



It was swell to get back to the table.

August gusto!

Bad movie night! Yeah! Here we go! First up ..."Dean Martin Variety Show"
Ev'ahbuddy luvs sumbuddy, right Dean? Cheese connot be sliced thicker than this and still tolerated. Thankfully we only viewed about 10 minutes. Seemed longer. Reminds me of what TV used to be back in days of yore and why many found it a BORE! Let's let Nick Tosches sum up Mr. Martin's last gasp. Below is a pic of a page from Nick's book "Dino". A damnation summation.

View Two: "Spaceship" by Puddle of Mud (?)

"Let's get it over and just get NAKED!" Yeah baby, Rock n Roll!
View Three: "Brit-Knee"

Geez ...this is almost embarrassing! Watchin' her beat up "Paps" and groan over some knuckle dragger who can't hit his mouth with a milk carton? What's the game crew come to?
View Four: "Family Guy"

This was hilarious ...to me! The dog get's down with Quagmire's Dad. Not for everyone. I laughed.
View Five: "The Avengers"
How long could you stand watching Emma Peel get chased around by silver skinned, trench coated, dark spec sportin' robots? All night! Classic Avengery via "Evil" E. Thanks!
View Six: "Uh ..."

Yeah, B's bro B brought in some classic vid but ...must have been a fun night cuz I can't recall. Yes, yes I did have a martini, mea culpa. Did not drive until I was sober! ( 1 drink at 5, drive at 9)

View Seven: "Death to all but METAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Hit of the night! Haven't seen this video yet? Well ...get your peepers over to Youtube and start the visual feast. Big, big laughs! Even the Missus thinks this one is a slap knee hoot! See ya next month when we'll be back on the die rollin' schedule!

Orson Recommends the New Bad Movie Night Cave

July-bation

Game one: "Zombiegeddon" Alright! Let'as start the eve with an ol' fashioned brain eater beater. The object of this game is to collect guns 'n' supplies during the first part and in the second part to KILL THEM ZOMBIES while getting your own markers safely into shelter. Actually not as brutal as it sounds and far more of a cerebral puzzler than an actual whomp down.
Still ...lots of fun and comes with a recommendation in spite of the fact that the winner was half an undead grey matter ghoul himself. We see the triumphant Dr Kirby hiding his win grin behind the game container above.

Game two: "Destination Mars"

Hmm ...sounds like it might be fun ...awfully small board ...cool rockets though ...only two players? Well, this was a basic card draw, count dots and first to the finish is the winnah. *yawn* This MUST have been a free give away with some kind of sign up for cable TV or something! A magazine subscription? Prize for selling flower seed packets? I doubt even an 8 year old would be fooled into playing this more than once. Isn't it possible to at least throw in some fun Mars facts? I guess there was planetary facts in the cards but ...man! Can we go back to beatin' zombies pleeze?
Here we see the dynamic 12" by 4" inch game board simulating the treacherous trip to the red planet. *GASP!* OH! The peril! How did our contestants ever make this flight of danger?
The rockets were neato retro but ...only 2 of them? seems a gyp not to mention a waste of a great marker.

Well, no surprises that the triumph went to Dr K. Above we see him hitting the ham with the liliputian box this game comes in. I believe I'll cut this baby up for parts. Gotta be a better way to use those rockets!

Game three: "Mind Maze"

Cue ominous theremin music. Mind Maze! Will your puny mentality be able to withstand it's frightening rigors? Mind Maze! A challenge to strain the brain of mortals planetwide! Mind Maze! Made for the Mensa set!

It's obvious from the pic on the box cover that this "no peek" variation of "Tickle Bee' (Anyone recall that game? Anyone?) has the same magnetic premise: get the marble to the goal. Ta-Da! The gag here is that you set up a maze for your opponent to run while they do the same for you and first one done takes the laurel.

Above "Evil E" and Dr Kirby struggle with each other labyrinths trying to raise their steel marker to the goal.

And the winner? Well ...after a short time everyone gave up. This after flipping the board and being unable to run the maze that they themselves had constructed. HA! Blame Game had the best seat in the house watching them both try over and over again, each slowly beating their ball against an impassable wall. Ahem!
Evil takes a look and still has a challlenge trying to wiggle the steely along. Give up man! The clocks run out and our three guy game play has come to an end for yet another month. See you in August with hopefully a far better turn out!